


Le Noir

by lovelyairi



Category: B.A.P
Genre: Angst, Dirty Talk, Drug Abuse, Incest, Kinks, M/M, Smut, age gap, sex with a minor, slight BDSM
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-23
Updated: 2018-02-19
Packaged: 2018-12-19 01:57:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 13
Words: 21,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11887503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovelyairi/pseuds/lovelyairi
Summary: Yongguk only wanted his brother to live a happy lifeTo do so, he fell deep into prostitutionAnd he purposely chooses to hide in the shadowsBut what happens when his brother walks through his door as a client?





	1. Sing Me To Sleep [Prologue]

Yongguk snuggles further into his scarf as he trudges his way down the snowy walkway, inwardly cursing at the appearance of snow despite it only being barely mid October. The world was fucked that was for sure.

He carefully held onto the wad of cash he'd gained through his customers of the past two weeks and entered the building. Yongguk made his way towards the long line and took a deep breath as he waited.

Yongguk worked as a prostitute. And although it seems like something he was forced into, he chose this path. He'd chosen this path at the age of 16 when he decided to leave his brother in order to create a better life for him.

It was illegal at the time he knew that. But doing something secretly never really hurt anyone. Yongguk had made sure his brother was safely adopted by a worthy family and he'd packed up at left when his brother was 6 years old.

He made sure to tell the family that he'd be responsible for his brother's education and allowance even though they had offered to help him out. Yongguk refused and promised he'd send a reasonable amount of money to his brother every two weeks.

Yongguk hadn't seen his brother in 12 years and at this point, he'd decided that he probably wouldn't meet him ever. It'd be too hard to re create any kind of bond they had years ago.

And Yongguk would be lying if he said he wasn't afraid.

He exits the bank after transferring the money and he sighs as he makes his way back towards his workplace. He didn't have any work to do today, but his apartment was nearby just in case they were short of staff.

Yongguk shivers as he rounds the corner and he avoids looking at the bright neon signs that were turned off for now. He acted as though he didn't want to be associated with that kind of place and it was true.

He shook his head and reached his small apartment building. Yongguk's gloved hands shake as he unlocks his front door and he waddles inside, thankful for the wave of warmth enveloping his body.

Yongguk removes his shoes and kicks them aside as he hangs up his coat, he then removes his scarf and gloves before putting them in his coat pocket. He sighs and throws himself onto the couch feeling absolutely exhausted.

Yongguk takes a deep breath and reminds himself that he continues living for his brother.

 

Choi Junhong was adopted by the Moon family when he was 6 years old. According to his adoptive parents, he had his mother's last name and he did indeed have an older brother whom had his father's name.

Junhong had been wanting to contact his brother since he'd learned of his existence at the age of 13 but he had no way of contacting him. Even his adoptive parents had no clue where he was.

All Junhong knew was that every two weeks a sum of money appeared in his bank account and he was extremely thankful as well as unbelievably guilty to his mystery hyung.

"Hey Junhong," a peppery voice calls out to him as he's lounging around. Junhong turns his head and sees Youngjae take a drag of his cigarette before passing it to Jongup.

"What do you want to do for your 18th?" Youngjae asks as he exhales a pretty ring of smoke, Junhong had no idea how he did that. They were all at Youngjae's place, his parents were big CEO's or something and were never home.

"He's visiting his parent's as he does every year remember?" Jongup slurs and drools while Youngjae laughs loudly at him. Junhong can't help but laugh as well and he nods.

"Why do you want to do something before then?" Junhong questions as he throws a tissue box at his step brother. Jongup doesn't manage to catch it but Youngjae does. 

"I suggest we take a chance and live a little. We won't have anytime after your birthday after all, so I suggest, a brothel!" Youngjae exclaims his excellent plan and the looks on his friend's faces aren't too bright.

"Jongup-ah, we still have our fake ID's right? I'm going to need mine." Junhong says with a smirk and Jongup rolls his eyes but he doesn't disagree. Youngjae grins,

"Okay we're getting our boy laid!" Youngjae fist pumps into the air and Junhong cackles at him as he pestures Jongup for the cigarette. He was all about sexual establishments and he was only wondering what it'd be like to have a prostitute in bed with him.

 

Sing Me To Sleep - Alan Walker

 


	2. New York City

Junhong, Youngjae and Jongup all stood outside of the building with their hands in their pockets and blank looks on their faces. Their eyes trained on the flashing neon signs blaring at them almost violently,

"Not very subtle are they." Junhong points out flatly, it wasn't often that brothels advertised themselves in conservative 'ol South Korea. Youngjae jutted his bottom lip out and shrugged.

"They're very well known for what they do, popular place this one is." Youngjae says as he takes a drag of his cigarette before tossing it onto the cold ground, stomping it ungracefully with his foot.

"What exactly do they do here?" Jongup asks as they approached the doors, the teens hold up their IDs one by one and neither of them are stopped. They stand in the foyer, warming themselves up.

"The left side is exclusively for their prostitute/BDSM services. On the right side down the stairs is the dance floor and bar, there's also rooms there for people to do whatever they please, but all of the "fun" stuff is on the left side." Youngjae explains as he gestures to each side.

"How do you know so much about this?" Jongup scoffs as he crosses his arms, Youngjae looked like he got out the least between the three of them. Youngjae shrugs and looks at Junhong.

"We've already booked you a session with the best worker in the brothel/club. We only booked you a one night stand, since we don't think you're too into the BDSM thing and I'm sure you want something up your ass tonight." Youngjae winks and Junhong rolls his eyes.

"Thanks guys, seriously." he says in all honesty since he knows this sort of establishment couldn't have been cheap. Youngjae and Jongup both grin at him and they turn to the right,

"We'll be in the bar area so look for us after you're done. Remember to get out of there if he seems like a creep alright?" Youngjae reminds him and Junhong nods obediently. He watches as his friends leave before he steps up to the counter.

"Name?" the woman asks without even lifting her head, Junhong looks over her name with interest. Yongsun. He'd have to remember that if this brothel was worth frequenting.

"Choi Junhong." he answers nonchalantly. Yongsun looks over her computer screen and purses her pink tinted lips before she smiles politely at him, showing her dimples.

"This way please, Mr. Bang will be with you momentarily." Yongsun informs him as she walks him down a long hallway, lined with doors on each side. They reach the door at the very end and for some reason Junhong feels nervous.

"Sit tight for a few moments, you should loosen up. Although, Mr. Bang knows exactly what he's doing." she says to him playfully before closing the door behind her.

Junhong stands around for a moment looking around the room. It seems like an average bedroom to be very honest. The lighting was a little dimmer than usual but there was a bed and a nightstand with a small lamp perched on top of it.

He wondered what the playrooms looked like.

 

"Yongguk oppa, you have a client waiting for you in Room 26." Yongsun chirps as she peers into the staff dressing room. It was a joint room where the prostitutes and performers got ready all the same.

"Alright, thank you Yongsun." Yongguk mumbles as he grabs an extra condom from the basket near the doors that lead to the bedrooms. Yongsun hovers around for a moment and crosses her arms.

"He's a first timer. And he's pretty, just your type." she says to him and Yongguk raises an eyebrow. Well that would explain why he chose the bedroom rather than the playroom he thought to himself.

"They requested you personally, so good luck in there. Don't make him scream too loud, that room still needs some sound proofing done." Yongsun warns him and Yongguk playfully rolls his eyes,

"Why give me that room then?" he sighs and picks up his eye mask. They're work place was very keen on keeping their workers private, due to possible dangerous fans.

"We only have 3 bedrooms and 2 are occupied. I thought you'd be doing BDSM tonight, it's what you're known for." Yongsun pouts and for a moment Yongguk wonders why she was working in a club, then he remembers their wild night weeks ago and that image is gone.

"Okay okay, anything else you need to tell me?" he says hastefully when Kai and Sehun attempt to practice their pole routines in the middle of the room. Yongsun thinks for a moment and the two exit the dressing room.

"Do you have time for a drink later, oppa?" she grins and Yongguk smirks at her. He then pokes her cheek and she laughs at him, playfully swatting his arms away.

"I'm flattered Yongsun but we all know drinking with you is a nightmare." Yongguk refuses and laughs in her high pitched dolphin tones before walking back to the front desk.

Yongguk fits his mask over his eyes and runs his fingers through his gelled hair, instantly regretting it. He scratches his leg through his leather pants and curses his job for the nth time that night.

He approaches Room 26 and doesn't think much as he opens the door. It's been a long time since he actually had sex with a client, since part of the BDSM rules was that penetration was not included.

"You took awhile." a semi deep voice caught his attention and Yongguk lifted his head. He met a pair of dark brown eyes and his stomach flipped inside out. Yongguk stumbled back in surprise, closing the door behind him with a deafening echo.

It'd been 12 years but he could recognize those features anywhere. Those rounded cheeks were now slimmer but his dimple was there in the same place. His hair was a bright blonde and his skin was as pale as it'd always been.

He looked aged, but he was still youthful. Yongguk had no doubts that the person in front of him was his younger brother. He begins shaking his head and his mind rattles a number of ways for him to escape.

"You know, for the "top prostitute" I thought you'd be much more aggressive." the teen says with a huff as he eyes over the discomfort of the man. He raised an eyebrow and stood up.

"My name is Junhong, I'd rather you be calling out my name while fucking me. I suppose I stick to calling you Mr. Bang?" Junhong continues and Yongguk feels the urge to vomit.

Meeting Junhong at work was the last thing he'd ever imagined. And the worst thing was, Yongguk was absolutely positive that his younger brother wasn't old enough to be here.

"Aren't you too young to be here?" Yongguk gruffs out instead his voice shaking ever so slightly. Junhong seems aroused by his voice and he feels so sick, he takes deep breaths.

"I had to get in here somehow don't you think? I may look young but I'm old enough." Junhong lies as he crosses the room, advancing on the man. He took a moment to look over the prostitutes body.

"Fuck you're so hot, it'd be nice if you were a little less tense though." Junhong mumbled and it was clear he was confused at Yongguk's behaviour. However before he could even think about laying a hand on his older brother, Yongguk turned around.

"I'll talk with Yongsun and get you a different worker. I can't do this." Yongguk sputters and he freezes when he feels Junhong's body pressed against his back. Junhong takes hold of his hand that's on the doorknob,

"I don't think so Mr. Bang. You see, my friends paid good money for you to help me celebrate my birthday and I'm quite attracted to you. So I'd like to get my night's worth of service." Junhong breaths hotly into his ear and Yongguk shivers upon discovering that he was his younger brother's birthday present.

"I could ruin your career with a bad review. Would you like that? Or would you rather stick your hot rod up my ass? I think we'd both like that." Junhong chuckles darkly as he runs his fingertips up and down the prostitutes clothed torso.

"Look, Mr. Bang I don't want to force you into anything. But at the same time, I feel like I only need to push a few buttons and you'll be all over me." Junhong bites at Yongguk's silver stud.

"You're hard, I'm hard. So how about it? Let's Bang." Yongguk looks down at the tent in his pants in utter horror and Junhong cups him firmly, causing a moan to slip from his lips.

"That's it big boy, feel me. Fuck me." Junhong moans shamelessly as he ruts his erect member against Yongguk's thigh. The prostitute grits his teeth and switches their postions, slamming Junhong into the door as he connects their lips.

Junhong hums in appreciation and he jumps up, wrapping his legs around Yongguk's waist as he bumps their members against one another. Yongguk licks his way into his brother's sweet cavern and he loses himself in lust to keep his morals from stopping him.

The sooner he got this over with, the sooner he wouldn't have to see Junhong anymore.

"Fuck Mr. Bang." Junhong whimpered as Yongguk captured his lips once more and the prostitute tried to ignore the taste of cigarettes so evident on his tongue. 

Yongguk carries them over towards the bed and they both fall onto the sheets, Junhong immediately spreading his legs to accomodate the prostitute between his thighs.

"Don't think about anything. Just think about me. You're mine for tonight." Junhong says to him in a posessive tone and Yongguk wants to scream the truth at him, but he can't. 

It'd ruin everything he'd worked so hard to create.

This was his little brother beneath him. The little brother that kept him going. The little brother who used to cling onto him when he had nightmares about their parents. 

The little brother he was defiling.

"Remove your clothes." Yongguk orders and Junhong obeys, sitting up so that he could take off his sweater and t shirt, he throws it over to where he'd hung his coat and he unbuckles his belt before eyeing Yongguk.

"Won't you take these off for me?" Junhong wiggles his hips cutely and Yongguk tries not to sigh as he pulls off the black jeans in one go. He then removes his own shirt but keeps his pants on, merely undoing them for easy access.

Yongguk takes a moment to look over his brother's beautiful naked body but reminds himself that this was indeed his younger brother and he looks away. Junhong on the other hand finds the prostitute absolutely alluring.

Yongguk reaches over to the nightside table and pulls out a bottle of lube before tossing the condom packet he'd brought with him onto the mattress beside Junhong's head. He could feel his consciousness slipping from him.

"Lift your hips for me." Yongguk says quietly and Junhong hooks his hands behind his knees before exposing himself fully. The prostitute looks over his twitching hole and smirks.

"Look at how you're twitching for me slut." Yongguk growls as he plants a smack onto Junhong's left cheek, the teen howls in pain and nods desperately at the comment.

"I'm ready for you to open me up. Please." he whines as he watches how Yongguk deliberately takes his time coating his fingers. He then leans over Junhong, burying his face into the crook of his neck as he nudges a finger inside knuckle deep.

"Fuck Mr. Bang!" Junhong gasps at the feeling and Yongguk sucks dark spots onto his pale neck, biting at his collar bone almost animalistically. Yongguk pushes in another finger mercilessly and Junhong tenses up.

"I can't hear you slut. Louder." Yongguk demands and he knows he's gone. Junhong moans as the prositute scissors his fingers roughly inside of him, stretching him for something much greater.

"Mr. Bang!" Junhong cries out when Yongguk adds a third finger and stabs his nails into his prostate. The teen lets go of one leg and he grips his weeping cock, stroking it lazily.

"That's right baby, stroke yourself faster. Come from my fingers like the dirty whore you are." Junhong absolutely loved the way that Yongguk was treating him, and he loved being handled roughly.

"Ah Bang!" Junhong screams as he comes all over his chest. Yongguk continues aiming at the teen's prostate as he laps up the teen's essence and he reaches for the foil packet.

"I'm clean, so don't you dare use it. I want you to fill me up. So I can remember how good you fuck me for days." Junhong pants as he grups the prostitute's wrist. His eyes lidded and his face pink from his orgasm.

Yongguk knew that he could easily say he wasn't. But the idea of being inside someone so tight, with no cover seemed so delicious. He went against his better judgement and lubed up his cock.

"On your knees baby." Yongguk demanded and Junhong didn't hesitate to obey. He perked his ass up and spread his own cheeks, readying himself for the prostitute.

Yongguk hesitates as he prods his member against Junhong's puckered hole but the teen isn't having it. He easily pushes himself back and impales himself on Yongguk's dick.

"F-fuck yes! You're so big, wreck me Mr. Bang!" Junhong moans shamelessly and Yongguk grips his hips before plunging deep inside of him. Junhong screams at the pain and pleasure and Yongguk snaps his hips back and forth.

Junhong is mumbling nonsense as Yongguk fucks him into the mattress and he's completely euphoric when the prostitutes cock finds his prostate. Junhong snaps his head back instantly,

"Right there Mr. Bang!" Yongguk continues aiming for that same spot and he can feel Junhong convulsing around him. He knows he won't last long and he's relieved but his prostitutes pride is disappointed.

"I'm coming! Fuck Mr. Bang!" Junhong sobs as he grips onto the duvet and Yongguk gasps as roughly slams himself into Junhong's body, watching as the teen releases onto the duvet.

"Fuck Junhong!" Yongguk groans as he empties himself into his brother's body. He pulls out his cock and continues pumping white onto Junhong's ass as they both begin to calm down from their highs.

The heavy realization of what just occured between them fell on Yongguk and he almost fell off of the bed. His eyes wide in complete fear and disgust as he stared at anything but his brother.

"Wow, that was great. I can promise you Mr. Bang that I'll be back and you'll be seeing me again soon." Junhong laughs as he wipes himself off with the clean parts of the duvet and his legs shake as he dresses himself.

Yongguk tucks himself back in and puts on his shirt before he quietly helps the teen get dressed. Junhong seems surprised at the treatment but he doesn't refuse it. Yongguk is reminded of when he dressed Junhong when they were younger.

Junhong looks at the prostitute as he finishes zipping up his jacket and he turns to leave. Yongguk leaves the room without bothering to look back and rushes towards the dressing room to grab his coat.

"Yongsun I'm taking the night off." Yongguk mutters as he passes by the front desk, not listening to the confused calls of his name. He sprints back to his apartment and reaches it in record time.

Yongguk speeds up the stairs and unlocks his apartment door before he throws himself in the shower and scrubs his skin raw. He's hypervenilating and feels light headed when he falls onto his bed and that night Yongguk cries himself to sleep.

 

New York City - The Chainsmokers


	3. On Echo

Cold winds seep beneath his thin jacket as he hikes his way up the boarded pathway. Leaves coloured by Autumn get crushed underneath his heavy footsteps and he makes a left turn at the large maple tree before he arrives at the twin tombstones embedded on the high hill.

Yongguk eagerly rushes towards the graves as though he was a child waiting to meet his parents after a long day at school but no, he was a 28 year old prostitute whom just commited a great sin.

He slows down when he's a few feet away and Yongguk falls to his knees, his body quivering as he stares at his hands grasping the material of his jeans on his thighs. He can't find the heart to look at the graves.

"I know I won't be forgiven but I want to pray for forgiveness anyways." Yongguk whispers into his clasped hands as he bows down, his forehead resting against the cold grass covering the hard ground.

"Father, Mother, where did I go wrong? Should I have stayed with him?" Yongguk's mind is running in circles and suddenly his valiant efforts to care for his brother seemed absolutely useless.

His parents had left them when Junhong had only just turned 5 years old. Yongguk had left him when he was 6, maybe that was why Junhong was the way he was. He'd been left behind twice.

 "I know this isn't the life you wanted for us, I tried my best. I really did. And I'll continue to try, I'll keep Junhong away from my lifestyle." Yongguk whispers empty promises as the breeze whips him mercilessly.

"Junhong will be coming soon I believe, I must go Mom... Dad. I'll be back." Yongguk kisses his fingertips and presses them against the frozen tombs. He then pulls out a small present he'd had in his pocket and he placed it near the pot of incense. 

Yongguk reached for one of the sticks of incense and straightened his back, kneeling upright. He then lit the end of the stick with the lighter in his pocket and he closed his eyes to pray before he wedged the stick into the ashes lying in the pot.

"I'll be back." he says quietly as he stands. Yongguk knows he won't be visiting anytime soon, not until he can feel safe enough to call himself their son once again. 

 

Junhong gasps as he steps out of the train and he holds the bouquet of flowers in his gloved hands. He knows they'll die within seconds of being in the cold but he wanted his parents to enjoy them while they lasted.

He hurries along to familiar cemetery entrance and he prays and hopes that maybe this year he'll run into his older brother. He only ever knew that his brother visited before him and no matter how early he arrived, he'd never catch a glimpse of anyone else.

Junhong shivers as he carefully makes his way up the pathway, his ass aching and his thighs burning. Maybe getting laid by a prostitute wasn't the smartest choice before his visit.

It'd been two days since he celebrated with the prostitute and his ass was still in pain. He pouted at the thought then decided to clear his mind of such dirty things since he was surrounded by the dead.

As he makes his way up he sees another man exiting from the field of graves on his right and he raises an eyebrow at the stranger who has his face covered by a scarf.

Junhong doesn't stare for long and he continues up towards his parents grave, turning left and upward to climb the hill. As he approaches the graves he notices a burning stick of incense and a small present.

He unconsciously drops the bouquet and he turns around frantically. Junhong's eyes find the stranger down near the bottom of the hill and he breaks into a sprint.

"Hyung!" he screams as loud as he can, and although he wants to run faster he can't risk falling down a hill and breaking his body. It could have been his imagination but the stranger's steps grow faster and he scans his card to enter the train platform.

"Wait, hyung!" Junhong yells again but when the stranger disappears into the train's doors he skids to a stop. He pants as he tries to level his breathing and a sick feeling arises in his stomach.

"Maybe it wasn't hyung?" Or maybe he doesn't want to see you. Junhong shakes his head at the latter thought and he decides to believe that maybe the person was a stranger.

Dejected, he makes his way back up the pathway and back towards his parents. Junhong bends down to pick up the bouquet of flowers and he sits down cross legged on the cold ground.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to drop these... I just thought maybe that it was him." Junhong apologizes as he places the flowers down in front of him. He smiles as he slowly dusts off the stones and he lets his fingers run over the carved names.

"I wish you guys were here. It'd be nice, having a family. I love the Moon's don't get me wrong, they've taken care of me so well but they're not the same." Junhong cradles his knees against his chest and he sniffles.

"I wonder why hyung and I have different last names. Weren't you guys married? If I meet him, will he tell me the truth about what happened to you guys? I don't think it was a murder suicide." Junhong whispers the last part, his body shuddering at the thought.

His memories of his childhood were sparse but they were happy. He could only remember warmth in his childhood, warmth from his parents and warmth from his older brother.

Junhong reaches for the present near the incense and he carefully unwraps it, leaving the small card within for last. It's hard to do with gloves on but he manages and when he opens it he sees a silver chain with a crown pendant.

He smiles at the choice and he knows it must've been expensive. Junhong removes his gloves and puts on the necklace, the cold silver feels offensive against his hot skin.

He put his gloves back on and finally looks at the card. Junhong skims over the neat handwriting and he doesn't see any kind of number or address, just like the previous years.

"Happy 18th birthday Junhong. I'm sorry and know that I'm proud of you - Yongguk hyung." Junhong puts the card in his pocket and he feels sadness welling up inside of him.

He so desperately wants to meet his hyung, there was nothing else he wanted. Junhong pulls out the small note he'd kept in his own pocket and he placed it under the pot of incense, he leaves a note every year.

"Yongguk hyung." he whispers and the name feels so foreign on his tongue. He sighs and pulls a cigarette from the pack in his jacket pocket, lighting it up in a heart beat and placing it against his lips.

Junhong loves the way the warmth heats up his insides and it makes him feel giddy. He tilts his head and exhales the poison into the air, the smell of incense and tobacco surrounding him as he remembers how hot a certain prostitute felt inside of him.

 

On Echo - Mree


	4. It's Cold

Yongguk entered the mall with a sigh and he could feel the heater blasting against him as soon as he walked through the automatic doors. It was nearing December however it wasn't nearly as cold.

Even today Yongguk was only dressed in a thin jacket over a t shirt and jeans. He could already feel himself burning up and he was easily reminded that he hated the heat.

He had agreed to meet up with Himchan and Daehyun today. They had been his friends from before he dropped out of high school and thankfully they didn't lose contact even though Yongguk tried to stray from them in shame.

Daehyun was the bartender at Babyz however and so the two were easily brought back into his life. And although Himchan wished that things could have turned out different for Yongguk, he also knew that the other was doing whatever he could to survive in his own way.

He nimbly made his way through the mall and he tried to remember the way to the food court. He'd been there multiple times but for some reason everytime he went something new had been expanded or added and he got easily confused.

Yongguk stepped onto the descending escalator and he leaned on the railing with a sigh. Last nights client had been overly clingy and he'd told Solar to stop booking her with him but it was useless.

"Yongguk! Damn, rough night?" Himchan called out to him and Yongguk approached with a small smile. He sat down beside Daehyun and the younger placed a cup of tea in front of him.

"Clingy client. She pulled a knife on me last night, something about her wanting me as her personal slave." Yongguk shivered at the memory. Daehyun nodded along since he had the same shifts as Yongguk did.

"Shit, were the police involved? You're okay right?" Himchan asked in worry and Yongguk quickly nodded, accepting the tea with a mutter of thanks before he took a sip.

"Yongguk hyung used the emergency button. Each room is equipped with one, if it's pressed the security are alerted. We don't bring in the cops unless it's really serious. We have to keep things low you know." Daehyun responds as he stirs around his frozen drink.

"The button's only been used 5 times since the club opened. Yongguk hyung used it twice, I used it once." Himchan raised an eyebrow at the younger and Daehyun smiled sheepishly.

"I was trying to reach for the sake we keep beneath the counter but I pressed it by accident. Since then we keep no alcohol near the button." he laughed and Yongguk joined in.

"You know Yongguk about your brother," Himchan begins and Yongguk immediately shoots him a glare. They'd discussed the topic numerous times back when Yongguk had decided to leave Junhong in the first place.

"I don't want to talk about him here." Yongguk said with a stern expression. Daehyun was sending wary glances to Himchan because they both knew how defensive Yongguk became about his brother.

"Yongguk he's already 18. Do you really want to avoid him when he's right there waiting for you?" Himchan sighed in a frustrated tone. Yongguk gripped his drink tightly, if anything he should be irritated not Himchan.

Yongguk doesn't bother answering and Himchan rolls his eyes before he begins playing with his phone. At any other given time Yongguk would consider meeting Junhong, but now that they've crossed the line. It was impossible.

Not another word is spoken between the three of them and Daehyun simply slurps on his drink loudly as he looks around the mall like a lost kid. The sound of Himchan's name being called catches their attention and the three look up from the table.

"Himchan hyung, fancy meeting you here." a short looking male says to Himchan and another is by his side. The pretty looking one by his side seems to recognize Daehyun and he averts his eyes.

"Hey Jongup, this is Yongguk and Daehyun. Yongguk, Daehyun this is Jongup, his older brother works with me, and beside him is Youngjae." Himchan introduces them and they all kind of awkwardly nod at each other.

"Only you two? You're not with Junhong today?" the name makes Yongguk cough up his tea and Daehyun pats his back in an instant. He reaches for the napkin Himchan hands to him and avoids the weird looks from the teenagers.

"Junhong's in the washroom. We told him we'd meet him in the food court." Youngjae explains and he fiddles with his fingers nervously. Yongguk shakes his head and stands up.

"Sorry Himchan, I forgot I had to do something. I'll text you two later." Yongguk blurts out and before Daehyun or Himchan can utter a single word he's making his way towards the escalator.

Just as he does so a tall teenager exits the washroom and bumps into him. Yongguk stumbles ever so slightly and as he raises his face to apologize he's met with beautiful brown eyes.

"Do I know you?" Junhong mumbles as he stares at Yongguk's face. The elder immediately turns his head and avoids his gaze, cursing his luck and he notices Junhong wearing his birthday present.

"No I don't think so. Sorry." he apologizes quickly and heads up the escalator leaving Junhong behind. Seeing him in broad daylight only reminded Yongguk just how young he actually was and suddenly he feels disgusting all over again.

 

Yongguk returns to the comfort of his home with a headache and a nauseous feeling in his stomach. He had work in about three hours and although he wanted to skip for today it was holiday season.

The prices rose at Babyz which meant Yongguk could be making twice or even three times as much as he usually would. He really wanted to take those extra shifts so he could give Junhong some more spending money this Christmas.

Maybe he could spoil himself a little too.

Yongguk throws himself down on the stale couch and he grunts as he tries to make himself comfortable. The cushion he bought long ago was now lumpy and flat beneath his head and he wished it was soft and supple.

Soft and supple like Junhong's thighs maybe... Yongguk's eyes opened and he felt his heart speeding up in shock. He closed his eyes and tried to think of something else to distract him but the smooth feeling of Junhong's skin was plaguing his mind.

Yongguk could easily remember Junhong's amateur dirty talk but his oddly experienced grinding. Junhong was definitely no virgin and Yongguk felt upset about it. He'd expected his brother to stay innocent till adulthood at least.

Unconsciously he snaked his hand into his jeans and he stroked his clothed member, toes curling at the feeling. His mind trailed to Junhong's wide eyes and he remembered how watery they became when Yongguk got rough with him.

He pulled his pants and briefs down till they were constricting his thighs and he pumped his erect cock shamelessly. Junhong had been moaning for him so loudly, and he had been so sensitive.

Yongguk bit his lower lip as a moan threatened to escape his own lips and he thumbed his slit frantically wanting to find some kind of release. He could still feel Junhong's heat surrounding him and he groaned.

His mind trained onto the memory of Junhong's face when he came, the way he seemed to be lost in complete euphoria. His sweaty hair sticking to his moist skin and the way he threw his head back as he screamed Yongguk's name.

"Junhong!" Yongguk gasped as he came onto his shirt. His hips thrusted upward into nothing as he rode out his orgasm and he light pants escaped his lips as he tried to calm down.

Yongguk let go of his limp cock and he felt like throwing up. He removed his pants completely and stood up before making his way towards his bedroom. As he entered his room he wiped himself clean with his used shirt before he tossed his dirty clothing into the laundry basket.

He pulled out a clean pair of briefs from his drawer and slipped them on with a shudder. Yongguk instantly covered his mouth and he ran to the washroom, practically ripping open the mirror cabinet before he grabbed his cannabis.

Yongguk quickly rolled it like a professional and he pulled the lighter out from underneath his antidepressants. Without thinking twice he light up the end of the joint and inhaled deeply.

Yongguk didn't care that he had work later or that this would cause him to relaspe. All he cared about was ridding himself of these disgusting urges even if it was only for a little while.

 

It's Cold - Epik High Ft. Lee Hi

 


	5. If I Believe You

As Yongguk arrived at BABYZ that evening for his shift he could already feel exhaustion lining his bones. It probably wasn't a good idea to get high before work but then again, who in the right mind would do his job sober?

He was slightly concerned about what Yongsun would say about his sudden leave last time, he'd still had a few hours on the clock if he remembered correctly. With a sigh he opened the steel doors.

"Yongguk oppa, Yongsun unnie wants to talk to you. She's in the dressing room scolding Kai and Sehun." Byulyi offers from behind the counter, Yongguk sighs and he leans forward.

"Can't you just forget you saw me? Then I can start my shift quietly and no one will get into any trouble?" he pleads with his hands clasped and she looks at him with blank eyes.

"Oppa, do you really want to avoid Yongsun unnie after the stunt you pulled? She'll take Daehyun hostage if she has to." Byulyi says with a laugh and Yongguk rolls his eyes, as if Byulyi would betray her girlfriend.

"Fine, do I have any appointments I should know about?" Yongguk says as he scratches his head, Byulyi purses her lips and she skims down the screen. Wheein appears from behind the counter and she flashes her dimple at the man.

"Yongsun unnie will fill you in. Go on oppa, stop stalling." she chirps and Yongguk narrows his eyes, he swears all of the female employees are against him. He walks down the narrow hallway and ignores the screams of pleasure he hears from Room 10.

"Yongsun-ah, you wanted to see me?" Yongguk asks as he steps into the joint dressing room. Inside he can see Kai and Sehun kneeling on the floor with their arms hanging in the air.

"I told you two that you're not acrobats! The poles aren't safe to jump off from, it's not even part of the standard routine." Yongsun huffs, resting her hands on her hips as the two performers pout.

"But our routine gets so boring. We spin around, body roll, thrust and repeat! And last time we tried throwing Wheein she fell off the stage." Kai reasons and Yongsun rolls her eyes,

"Because you weren't supposed to throw her! Whatever, go talk over the routine with her, we open in half an hour." Yongsun sighs and the two exchange a glance before standing up.

Yongguk watches as Kai goes over to Kyungsoo who's one of the BDSM workers along with Yongguk, the two are dating so Kyungsoo never used the bedrooms. He was solely sworn to the playrooms.

"Yongguk oppa." Yongsun grits through her teeth as she turns to the man who had been lost in his thoughts. Yongguk looks up at her and runs through his prepared apology speech in his head.

"You know, thanks to your little stunt last time I had to get Suho to sub for you. I didn't say anything till now because you were let go early last time due to the knife incident... but it was very unprofessional oppa." Yongsun sighs and Yongguk nods numbly.

"You know, if a client makes you uncomfortable you can leave. You're not obligated to stay in there." she reminds him in a calmer tone and Yongguk nods once more.

"The same client has booked you for a BDSM session, will you alright? It's okay to refuse." Yongsun says to him and Yongguk's eyes widen. Junhong was requesting for him again? So soon?

He lets his situation play within his head so that he can get a better viewpoint. As wrong as it was for him to do such things to his little brother, it'd make him feel worse if someone else were to touch him.

The other BDSM workers were Kyungsoo, Hwasa, Baekhyun and Chanyeol. Although Hwasa was female so she'd be eliminated, Baekhyun and Chanyeol only took clients together so they could feed their own exhibitionist kinks so that left Kyungsoo.

Yongguk glanced over to the younger male who was currently kissing his boyfriend. Kyungsoo may look cute and innocent but D.O was the definition of a sadist in the bedroom, he wouldn't go easy on Junhong. And if Yongguk requested him to it'd be strange.

"Yeah it's fine. I'll be okay. Keep Room 12 open for me please?" Yongguk exhales shakily and Yongsun gives him a tight lipped smile, she nods and fiddles with her fingers.

"Yeah it's perfectly okay. The session is at 10:30, you have an hour and a half to yourself." she says to him and he nods in thanks. Yongsun then leaves the room presumably to return to the counter and Yongguk sighs.

"I haven't seen you so restless before hyung. Is everything alright?" Kyungsoo's smooth voice calls out to him and Yongguk sees that Kai is now gone and that Kyungsoo is standing in front of him, clad in his signature black leather.

"Yeah, things are okay. Thanks Kyungsoo." Yongguk feels his heart lighten when he sees that heart shaped smile and Kyungsoo goes off to do whatever he does before the brothel opens.

Yongguk exits the dressing room from the other doors and he's met with the dance floor. He crosses in a hurry and sits down at the bar, smiling at Daehyun who's washing his utensils.

"Need anything to start you off hyung?" Daehyun asks nonchalantly as he watches Wheein laughing her ass off as Kai and Sehun try to get her in on some weird routine of theirs.

"Just give me a shot of something strong." he murmurs quietly and he jumps when he feels someone sitting beside him. He turns his head and sees Hwasa with sweat lining her forehead and messy lipstick on her mouth.

"Get me whatever you're getting him Daehyun oppa." Hwasa requests and the bartender nods as he pours another shot for the lady. Hwasa taps her fingernails on the counter and she seems tired.

"That same business man?" Yongguk inquires as he downs his shot, sliding the empty glass back to Daehyun for another one. Hwasa holds her glass up and appraises the liquor.

"Yep, we only allow him to have early sessions because he pays well. Oppa, do you have a bedroom appointment later?" Hwasa asks before she drinks the harsh liquor, squinting as it burns her throat.

"Nope, BDSM." he replies and downs his second shot for the night. Daehyun then removes the glass because he knows the elder will get carried away and will end up being unable to perform his job.

"You're drinking before a BDSM session? Mr. Bang is famous for his BDSM." Hwasa frowns and it's clear she doesn't understand why the man is drinking his nerves away. 

"Things happen Hyejin-ah, who knows I might have a bedroom appointment afterwards." he mumbles and even Daehyun raises an eyebrow at this. Hwasa shrugs and looks back to the stage.

"No one books you for the bedroom. That's Suho's territory, occasionally Baekhyun and Chanyeol oppa's if the client is that freaky." Hwasa states bluntly and even Yongguk is aware of this.

"Hyejin, mind checking up on Wheein and the idiots up there? Make sure their routine is safe or your best friend will end up flying off the stage again." Daehyun says to her and she laughs loudly before she's marching to the stage.

"Yongguk hyung, if this client is affecting you like this it's best to cut them off." Daehyun's voice is serious and Yongguk purposely avoids his eyes, Daehyun had a way of looking at him that always made him want to break.

"Yongsun told you?" he whispered and Daehyun nodded, confirming the elder's suspicions that he knew the client was the same as last time. Daehyun had been discreet enough not to mention the client to Himchan but Yongguk knew he would sooner or later.

"I've never seen you run out like that before. Not even when you first started. One client won't ruin your reputation, you don't have to worry about your brother's funds." Daehyun's words are so close yet so far away and Yongguk commends the younger for being so observant.

"It's not that Daehyun, don't worry about me. I'll be okay. It's the client I'm worried about." Yongguk says and before Daehyun can question him the doors open and people come flooding in.

For another night of music, alcohol and sex.

 

Junhong returns to the brothel that night having called earlier to book an appointment with the famed Mr. Bang. This time however, he decided to go with a BDSM session, Youngjae had said he didn't know whether Junhong was into it but it didn't hurt to try. 

He was generally not a very submissive guy but when he remembered the way Mr. Bang dominated him last time it makes him excited and he's curious about the man's abilities. He was quite hard to read and Junhong was interested.

"Welcome, name?" Junhong lifts his head as he enters and he recognizes Yongsun from last time but another woman is asking him, she stands beside the other woman and her name tag reads, Byulyi.

"Choi Junhong." he answers languidly and he lets his eyes wander over towards the dance area, and he can swear he sees someone very familiar standing behind the bar.

"Junhong-sshi? I'll escort you to Room 12, Mr. Bang is already waiting inside." Byulyi calls out to him and Junhong whips his head back to look at her and he can see the confusion on her face.

"I haven't had a BDSM session before, what should I expect?" Junhong mumbles quietly as they enter the same hallway as last time, he glances at Room 26 and his cheeks feel warm.

"Mr. Bang is aware it is your first session so he'll brief you. From experience though, listen to what he says and don't talk back. He's very well versed in punishment and he knows how to deprive you whilst giving pleasure." Byulyi warns him as they reach the door.

"Will he hurt me?" he whispers and Byulyi turns to him in alarm, she gives him a warm smile and shakes her head. She places a gentle hand on his arm and squeezes reassuringly.

"Despite his demeanor he has a heart of gold. He'll take care of you." Byulyi says softly and Junhong nods, suddenly feeling foolish for showing his true emotions in front of a stranger.

Byulyi opens the door and lets Junhong step inside before she leaves, locking the door for privacy reasons. Junhong takes a moment to look around the room and he's surprised to see a normal room.

It wasn't much different from the bedroom aside from the fact that there was a rack of different tools off to the side and the lighting in the room was a soft pink tone, he then meets the eyes of the prostitute and his stomach flares up.

"I was expecting Fifty Shades of Grey or something." Junhong blurts out unexpectedly and Mr. Bang raises an eyebrow in surprise, he can't help but let out a small laugh.

"This room is for the first timers. The others rooms are even worse than that movie. Now, I will tell you the rules so pay close attention. We'll begin soon after." Mr. Bang states in a deep voice and it erupts goosebumps all over Junhong's skin and he nods.

"First, you'll respond to me with words. You are to call me Sir however if you're lost in pleasure I'll allow Mr. Bang to slip for a maximum of 3 times and then I'll punish you." Junhong shifts on his feet and he nods before he bites his lip.

"I understand, sir." he whispers loudly enough for Mr. Bang to hear and he feels pleasure running through his body just from seeing the smile of approval on the man's lips.

"To avoid punishment, simply obey my actions. I am the one in charge within this room. Not you. If you disobey, I punish you. Spanking, dry orgasms, I am to choose. If you voice your fears and worries I will take them into account." Mr. Bang reassures him and Junhong swallows hard.

"Safe words are extremely important. If at any point you feel uncomfortable or hurt stop me immediately. Red for when it's becoming unbearable and Black for when you want me to stop, I will do so completely. Understand?" Junhong runs the words over and over within his head.

"Yes I understand sir." he replies and Mr. Bang seems pleased, he motions for Junhong to step closer and he does so, his knees shaking as he stops about two steps away from the prostitute.

"Remove your clothing, leave your underwear on." Mr. Bang orders and Junhong doesn't hesitate to remove himself of his clothes. He feels the cold air embracing him and he shivers unconsciously.

Mr. Bang remains silent for moments that feel way too long as his dark eyes run up and down Junhong's body. He can feel the heat of the prostitute's heavy gaze on him and he feels so small.

"Pretty aren't you?" the man's gruff tone keeps Junhong's head down and he sees Mr. Bang picking up a leather crop from the nightside table. Junhong feels the flat end of the crop lightly tapping his chin and he looks up into the man's eyes.

"Beautiful." he whispers and Junhong can see something behind those orbs, the mask on his face may hide his identity but whilst looking into those eyes Junhong swears he knows the man like the back of his hand.

"On the bed." Mr. Bang's orders are curt and Junhong follows the order obediently, he'd rather do things right for his first experience. He lays himself down on the soft mattress and the prostitute gestures for him to lie down.

Junhong freezes when black covers his vision and he unconsciously grips onto the duvet beneath him, his breath laboured as Mr. Bang secures the blind fold around his head.

"Do you trust me Junhong?" the question comes suddenly and it feels like cold water had been spilt all over him. He can feel his heart pounding but he knows this is all part of the experience.

"Y-yes, yes I do." he answers with as much confidence as he can muster whilst he's blindfolded and pretty much naked. A deep chuckle runs up and down his spine and he feels rough fingetips dancing on his stomach.

"Excellent, now spread your legs for me baby boy."

 

If I Believe You - The 1975


	6. Undo

"Now baby boy, let me ask you something." Junhong shivers under the deepened tone of the man's voice, wrapping around his bare skin like velvet. He unconsciously licked his lips and wondered how he should respond.

"Yes sir." he says with shaky lips and he feels heat running through his limbs when Mr. Bang laughs lowly. He feels his cheeks reddening and he's so embarrassed, his thighs tremble before they begin to close and Junhong whimpers when what feel like a leather crop keeps them spread.

"Did I say you could close your legs baby boy?" Mr. Bang questions darkly and Junhong shakes his head. He cries out when the leather crop snaps against his inner thigh and he feels the fiery sensation lull into a dull ache.

"Use your words Junhong." he can tell Mr. Bang let go of his character, warning him of the rules he'd been told beforehand. He bites his lip and blinks under the blindfold.

"N-no." he gasps his answer to the previous question and Junhong heart stops when the crop comes down on his thigh once more, cracking as it hits his skin. He writhes in pain and he can hear Mr. Bang sighing.

"No what?" Junhong feels tears building up in his eyes and he wasn't even aware of when they started to form. He blinks them away and tries not to move when he feels the crop running along his abdomen, another hit to his rib sends him keening.

"No sir!" he yells and Mr. Bang seems pleased at this. Junhong's heart beats in his chest and he doesn't like this. He doesn't like it at all. He shakes his head and fears the cold leather touching his skin, he flinches when he feels it rise and he rips off his blindfold,

"Black, BLACK!" Junhong screams and he holds his hands up in defense, he looks at Mr. Bang's bewildered expression through his blurry vision and the man drops the crop immediately.

"Junhong..." Mr. Bang's gentle tone is back and he kicks aside the leather crop before carefully approaching, Junhong backs away on instinct and he can see the hurt expression in the man's eyes.

"I won't hurt you. It's okay, here put on your clothes and go home." his clothes are tossed to him from a distance and Junhong's heart races as he touches his inner thigh, wincing at the tender skin.

"I-I'm sorry." Junhong sniffles as he wipes his tears with the back of his hand. He never thought he'd be so afraid of it, it wasn't as though he was scared of Mr. Bang. He just didn't like being treated so low, like he didn't mean anything.

"No Junhong, I'm sorry. I-I'll call Yongsun to come tend to you." Mr. Bang mutters before he practically runs out of the room. Junhong holds himself to stop the trembling and he sighs.

 

When Junhong steps through the front door he's met with Jongup and Himchan cuddled up on the couch. He simply waves at the couple and removes his shoes. His and Jongup's parents are currently in Japan so it wasn't strange to see that Himchan was spending a lot of time with them.

"Hey Jun, you went back to the club?" Jongup asks nonchalantly as he stares at whatever the two are watching on his tablet. Junhong hums in response and he doesn't bother hiding it.

"Which club? Junhong you go clubbing now?" Himchan said with a smile and the younger rolled his eyes playfully before he slowly takes off his jacket, hanging it up on the small hook stand by the door.

"Babyz, same one we booked him a session at." Jongup answered as he looked up at Junhong, he noticed his friend didn't looked fucked but more so ruffled up. He'll ask him about it later.

"Babyz? My friends work there." Himchan states and he snuggles deeper into Jongup's shoulder, Junhong frowns at the sight since it looks really uncomfortable but he shrugs.

"So do you happen to know who Mr. Bang is?" Junhong can't help but ask and Himchan purses his lips. He seems to question whether or not he should say anything and in the end he shakes his head.

"He doesn't want to risk letting clients knowing who he is. Sorry Jun." Himchan apologizes and Junhong can only pout but he nods, it was only right of him to respect his friends wishes after all.

"Well I'm going to shower then head to bed, goodnight." Junhong yawns and he doesn't bother listen to the half hearted wishes of sweet dreams. He enters the washroom and does a really quick rinse, his eyes warily looking over the small red patches on his skin.

Junhong quickly steps out of the shower and he dries himself off before wrapping a towel loosely around his waist. He enters his room and pulls on a pair of briefs before throwing himself into bed.

The room was slightly lit by the dull lighting in the living room and it made Junhong feel safe. Ever since he was adopted, he never slept with his door closed. He'd been doing it since he was a child and he wasn't exactly sure why but he knew it made him feel better.

"Jongup-ah, you know how I told you about my friend?" Junhong hears Himchan's voice speaking hushed in the living room, he knows he shouldn't eavesdrop but Jongup should know better than anyone how he sleeps with the door open.

"The one with the brother?" Jongup replies and Junhong's eyes open. He stares at the hallway that leads to the staircase, he holds his breath and knows he can't help but listen now.

"Yeah... I'm worried about him. He works so hard to provide for his brother and he won't even try meeting him." Junhong's heart beat quickens and he hangs onto every word.

"You think he's scared right?" he can hear Himchan making a noise of agreement and Junhong listens as the leather on the couch squeaks as one of them adjusts their seating.

"It's been so long. He's been avoiding his brother since he decided to leave. I think he's scared of facing him. I'm worried for him though, at this point they might never meet. And what about his brother?" Junhong sits up and his jaw drops.

Himchan might know his Yongguk hyung.

 

After being told he has no more schedules for the night, Yongguk was sitting at the bar. The night was ending and the party was lively, Daehyun was cleaning up the bar for the night. He liked to start cleaning early, so he only handed out beers.

They both watch with wide smiles and clapping hands as Wheein, Sehun and Kai finish up their performance. The club was closing in half an hour and they were doing their best to impress, the tips were more generous at the end.

Wheein spins and Kai catches her before Sehun leans on her other side, the three grind together and they pose at the end. Whistles and applauses are heard from all around and Wheein bursts into her dimple grin when bills and coins are thrown on stage.

"Thank you! Everyone get home safely and we'll see you all tomorrow!" Yongsun states over the speakers and the clients all leave respectively for once. Yongguk sighs in relief because they won't be needing security to remove any drunken customers.

"Okay let's clean up and head home." Yongsun says with a clap and the workers all agree. Yongguk notices Baekhyun and Chanyeol are nowhere to be seen and he sighs,

"I'm not cleaning up any of the rooms. One of you guys can find Baekhyun and Chanyeol." he says and he's not even shocked when Wheein and Hwasa jump at the opportunity. Perverts those two were.

"Yongguk hyung, mind if I stay over tonight?" Daehyun asks as he wipes the counter down. Yongguk grabs a broom from Sehun and he passes it to Kyungsoo who whips Kai with it.

"Sure." Yongguk answers without hesitation. He bites his lip and focuses on cleaning, he doesn't want to think about Junhong. He doesn't want to think about how he was the one who caused so much fear in his younger brother.

No one's used the safeword Black before. Red had been the warning but they'd always pull through, Junhong however...

"Oppa, clean. We're all tired hmm?" Byulyi whispers and pats his back when she notices his hands have stopped. Yongguk mumbles an apology and she smiles at him before continuing to mop the dance floor.

Cleaning doesn't take them very long since there were 11 people cleaning a not so big space. The rooms required more work however, cleaning the equipment and changing the sheets to beds was always a pain.

At precisely 2:45am, they were all waiting outside the front door for Yongsun to lock up. Yongguk and Daehyun stood close together, huddled like everyone else because the autumn night was cold.

"I'll see you all tomorrow at brunch hmm? I know Sunday is the day off but I'd like to celebrate." Yongsun says excitedly and they all nod before waving goodbye to one another. Making their way to their respective cars or homes.

Daehyun follows Yongguk closely, waddling behind him like a duckling following it's mom. They arrive at Yongguk's apartment fairly quickly and as soon as they're inside Yongguk goes for his weed.

"You know hyung, you can always talk to me or Himchan hyung. We don't mind the weed but if we see it's getting out of hand we will stop you." Daehyun narrows his eyes as Yongguk rolls a joint.

"I don't use it often... It's just..." Yongguk shakes his head and he shields his watering eyes from his friend's concerned stare. He lights the joint by the window and he opens it.

"I'm doing something so wrong." he sounds scared. Daehyun can tell. It wasn't knew for Yongguk to be vague about his problems, especially as of late. He was hiding something and they were trying to hard not to intervene.

Daehyun watches as Yongguk finishes off his joint before smushing the remainder in an ashtray on the window sill. Yongguk exhales the last of the smoke and he stumbles to stand.

"C'mon, let's get you to bed." Daehyun sighs and wrinkles his nose at the smell coming off of Yongguk. The elder doesn't complain, simply letting himself be dragged off while he's still high.

"I hurt him Daehyun. I hurt him." Yongguk sputters and he sounds like he wants to cry but can't. Daehyun doesn't answer and he removes Yongguk's outer clothing, leaving him in his boxers and wifebeater before pushing him onto the bed.

Yongguk falls lifelessly and he doesn't try to move, his dilated pupils darting around the room. Daehyun pulls the covers over the elder and he feels his heart hurting when Yongguk begins to cry.

"Hyung... we're here for you to rely on. When will you see that?"

 

Undo - The 1975

 


	7. Catch Me When I Fall

Numerous voices and murmurs roused him from his slumber and he groaned at the revelation that he was indeed awake. When he opens his eyes he sees numerous familiar faces looking down at him and he groans before turning on his side.

"Yah, you know if Daehyun here didn't let us in you'd still be sleeping. We have a brunch meeting in an hour you sloth!" Yongsun exclaimed as she ungracefully nudged Yongguk's duvet clad body with her foot. The elder turned to glare at her and saw Kyungsoo, Kai, and Byulyi watching him with amusement.

"Where is Daehyun anyways?" Yongguk mutters as he sits up, scratching his head lazily. He doesn't bother hiding his bare chest from his coworkers, he'd pretty much engaged in some kind of sexual activity with every worker to be honest.

"Over here hyung, I didn't bring any clothes so I'm borrowing some of yours." Daehyun's voice is muffled as he sticks his body into Yongguk's closet and the elder wonders why he has to shove himself in there.

"So umm, what're you all doing here? Brunch is at 1pm no?" Yongguk asks the pair of couples staring at him. Kai and Kyungsoo are dressed casually, in their jackets, t shirts and jeans while Yongsun is more classy in her blouse and skirt, Byulyi dressed like the other two to be honest.

"Well, we knew you two would be late so we decided to drop by. The others will meet us there." Kyungsoo says in a low tone and he scrunches his nose from the smell of stale weed and sleep.

"We'll wait in the living room as you freshen up." Kai says before ushering everyone out of the room, Yongguk sighs and he stands up, wavering ever so slightly. He doesn't miss the worried expression on Daehyun's face.

"Don't think I've forgotten what you said last night hyung. We will intervene if it gets too serious. We're not going to let you destroy yourself." Daehyun's voice is hard but his tone is laced with concern. Yongguk shakes his head and goes to the washroom, hoping that washing his face will rid him of his headache.

 

"Come come let's go, we'll be late otherwise." Yongsun sing songs as she skips ahead and the others follow her. As much as they'd like to act like they didn't know her, she was the manager and honestly she was the brightest worker in the brothel.

"Like Sehun and Wheein are going to show up on time." Daehyun rolls his eyes and Kai snickers at the comment. The place of choice was none other than a western style breakfast place called Sunset Grill, they served breakfast until 5pm it seemed.

"Hyejin already told me they're waiting inside, who knew getting a table for 12 was so hard." Yongsun replies and she laughs in her high pitched dolphin tones. Yongguk smiles as well and they enter the establishment.

He glances around and sees some foreigners, the smell of eggs and orange juice is pungent to his nose and his stomach flips at the strong scent of cheddar cheese. He didn't eat western often but he wasn't against it.

They spotted Sehun, Suho, Baekhyun, Chanyeol, Hwasa and Wheein occupying a good edge of the place. Hwasa waved them over and they crossed the floor, settling in at the joined tables. Yongguk took a place in between Kyungsoo and Hwasa, across from him was Sehun.

"I just wanted to have a little get together because our profit this week has increased 40% compared to last week! I know it's our busy season since the holidays are coming but December will be even busier so let's enjoy the rest of November!" Yongsun grins as the napkins and menus are passed out.

Yongguk knows it's just an excuse to celebrate but he doesn't hate it. He carefully looks around the table and he smiles at the way they all look so normal. To anyone else they just seemed like a group of young adults or maybe even college students.

No one would assume they worked in a brothel.

The people he'd met at BABYZ were honestly the most genuine and supportive people he'd ever had the honour of knowing. Whenever he needed any kind of help he could rely on anyone sitting at this table. He'd trust them with his life really, they all looked after one another.

Yongguk came back to reality when he noticed the menus being collected and he blinked in confusion. Suho noticed his perplexed expression and laughed at him in a non ill manner.

"Daehyun ordered for you hyung, you were lost in your thoughts anyway, what's on your mind?" Suho asks and Yongguk isn't sure what to say, he shrugs and leans back into the booth.

"I know our profits have gone up but I hope you're making enough for your brother." Wheein's tone was sincere as she leaned on the table to look at the eldest, the workers were all aware of the numerous times he'd asked for an early paycheck. Maybe if he didn't buy so much weed he'd be making more.

"Isn't oppa the one who makes the most though?" Hwasa's red lips pull into a smirk as she sips on her water and Kyungsoo shows off his signature heart shaped grin,

"Actually, Daehyun does." he points out and Daehyun acts offended. The table lulls into soft laughter but the atmosphere grows solemn once more, Kyungsoo fixes his posture to speak once more and Kai gently rubs his knee beneath the table.

"Hyung, if you ever need any help with anything know that you can rely on us okay? " he says seriously and Yongguk's heart feels warm when he sees the other workers nodding, even the forever nonchalant Sehun.

"Thank you, I've saved up enough for him to easily start post secondary so we should be fine. He'll have to work but that's life." Yongguk replies and the conversation moves on to Baekhyun and Chanyeol talking about a wild client they had last night.

Yongguk feels the nagging guily eating at his insides whenever he thinks about his younger brother but he tries his best to ignore it. For now he can only be thankful with the life he has, it may not be ideal, but it's his.

 

Catch Me When I Fall - Luhan


	8. Talk Me Down

As the night comes down upon them, the house falls into slumber, except for Junhong who remains awake long enough to make sure he'll be able to do as he pleases when no one can watch him.

As far as he's concerned, Himchan and Jongup fell asleep in the living room considering the two never came upstairs. Junhong leaves his room with his socks on since he doesn't want the floor to creak too much with the friction of his sweaty soles.

He turns left into Jongup's room and is pleased to see no one there, although there is a mass of missing pillows and blankets from the bed. Junhong peers through the dark and he sees what he had been looking for.

Himchan's phone.

The elder was always careless with it especially when he came to hang out with Jongup, he'd leave the device forgotten behind as he devotes all of his attention to the younger. Junhong found it sweet and he was thankful they were that interested in each other.

With his guilty conscious gnawing deep in the back of his head he picks up the elder's phone and types in Jongup's birthday. Thankfully he's easily let in and he has to remind Himchan to change his password, in a non obvious way of course.

Junhong checks Himchan's contact list since going through his messages would be an evasion of privacy... more than it already is. He sees a contact called Bbang and he decides to give that person a call.

He copies down the number on his own phone before he clears the running apps and returns Himchan's phone to where it was before. Junhong then slips out of the room and re-enters his own, leaving the door halfway closed since it'd be suspicious if he had it closed at night.

Without paying much attention to the time he wastes no time in dialling the number. Mr. Bang had late shifts anyways right? If this was him that is... god Junhong was hoping it was.

" _Hello_?" a low timbre of a voice answered and Junhong's heart jumped. His eyes widened dramatically and he felt a sudden rush of emotion, he ignored his nagging conscious and bit his lip.

"Mr. Bang?" he whispers fearing that if he raises his voice any further the man on the line would disappear. Junhong doesn't know why he's trying to get in contact with a BDSM worker he'd interacted with once or twice. 

" _How did you get this number_? _Look, I don't know who you're looking for but_ -"

"Wait please don't hang up! It's Junhong." he blurts out then he remembers that Himchan and Jongup are sleeping downstairs to he covers his mouth instinctively. Mr. Bang seems to contemplate this for a moment and silence washes over them.

" _Junhong? I really shouldn't be speaking with clients outside of work_..." the man seems to hesitate and Junhong reaches for his pack of cigarettes he keeps stuffed in his sock drawer, he needs some kind of comfort.

"Please, I just need someone to talk to." Junhong all but whimpers, he honestly feels so helpless. What part of him believed that speaking with a prostitute over his trusted friends was a good idea? What did this man know about him other than how his body felt?

" _I'll listen. So talk_." the response is curt and almost reluctant but Junhong smiles nontheless, tossing the cigarette pack to the side as he snuggles in his duvet comfortably. He starts with a sigh and wiggles his toes.

"You see... when I was younger, my parents died in an accident. I lived with my older brother for some time but then he left me behind. I was adopted by a kind family and my brother sends me monthly allowance." he leans on his side and closes his eyes.

"Lately it feels like he's so close by. He's been avoiding me since he left, I haven't met him at all. So I wonder, is he doing okay? Does he not want to see me? Why not? I'm sorry it's late and my mind is so scattered." he apologizes.

" _No... it's alright. Go on Junhong_." the deep tone of the man's voice feels like velvet in his ears, it soothes him unbelievably and it scares him to no end. Why did this man have such an effect on him?

The wind blows a cool current into the room and Junhong glances out the open window, despite it being near December he couldn't close the window just yet. The breeze kept him comfortable at night and he loved how the white curtains looked as they glowed beneath the moonlight.

"A friend of my stepbrother's says that he has a friend with the same problem as what I figure my brother would be going through. It got me thinking, is he closer than I thought? But what if I try and find him and he doesn't want me around? So many years have passed." his voice lingers off and he decides to stop talking.

" _I think you should try and think about it from your brother's point of view. If he's still sending you money then he still cares about you. Maybe he's just working too hard or he's afraid of how he should face you after all of these years. I'm sure he has his reasons so just try and understand him alright_?" Bang says quietly and Junhong almost misinterprets half of what he says because of how deep his voice is.

"Bang? Is it alright if I call you sometimes?" Junhong asks, he knows he's stepping across the line. Mr. Bang had a life and a persona that he was clearly keen on keeping private. Would he show Junhong his real self if he could?

"... s _ure Junhong_."

 

Talk Me Down - Troye Sivan


	9. Medicine

Yongguk stuffs his hands in the large pockets of his long coat as he makes his way towards the main street. The distance to his destination isn't drastic enough to waste money on a cab but it was enough to dress warmly for, especially since the weather was growing colder as the last days of November carried themselves out.

It was another free day of his since Yongsun usually gave them all the few days before the dreaded busy season of December to rest and have some time for themselves. The club would be open throughout Christmas and New Years so they really had to spend their free time wisely.

He was currently on his way to Kyungsoo and Kai's house. They had stated that they were hosting a little get together and Yongguk would never refuse the glory of enjoying Kyungsoo's homemade food, the man was a wizard in the kitchen.

The last time he'd gone to the couple's house on his own he was nearly coaxed into a threesome, not that he would mind but he wasn't sure whether he'd be able to satisfy the both of them, and Kyungsoo was more of a dominant anyways so it'd be difficult to work out.

He feels a buzz in his pocket and he assumes it's Kyungsoo asking where he is, since Kai usually loses his phone. However, he doesn't bother replying because the apartment is in view and Yongguk was in no mood for frost bite tonight.

With quiet footsteps he crosses the dampened parking lot and glances at the dead leaves glued to the cars parked out front, he approaches the warm doorway and presses the buzzer for the couple's apartment.

After a moment he's allowed upstairs and he proceeds to the staircase because elevators scare him. Thankfully Kyungsoo and Kai live on the 5th floor so it wasn't that much of a climb and he needed to warm up anyways.

He exits the stairwell and wipes his shoes on the carpet lined hallways before entering and his phone begins to go off from the numerous notifications now that he's connected to the WiFi. Yongguk knocks on the door and it opens within seconds.

"Hey hyung, come on in." Kyungsoo greets him with his hair comfortable on his forehead, glasses on his nose, an apron around his torso and a dirty spatula in hand. Yongguk removes his shoes and locks the door behind him.

"Jongin stop being lazy and come greet our guest." Kyungsoo scolds his boyfriend who's laying on the ground with his nose against a puppy's, Yongguk scoffs in amusement and stands in the doorway for a moment.

"He can see me love. Hey hyung, how are you?" Kai waves happily and he sits up to make the puppy wave at him too. Yongguk takes a seat on the couch behind Kai and tries not to kick him by accident.

"I'm fine, how are you two?" he asks and looks at Kyungsoo's backside as the younger stirs whatever he's cooking. Judging by the smell it's his usual kimchi spaghetti recipe and possibly a soup?

"It's been nice having time off. Hyejin and Wheein are on their way actually." Kyungsoo replies and he ladles a small sample into a dish before he tastes it, smacking his lips with a smile.

"Have you been doing anything with your free time hyung?" Kai asks when Monggu the puppy finally gets released from his clutches, he sits on a cushion on the floor and looks up at the elder.

"Not really no. I'm just going to borrow the balcony for a smoke, before the other two get here." Yongguk scratches his head and walks to the hallway but once he begins to remove the bag from his pocket which is set up with his joints and lighter he feels a hand tap his shoulder.

"No weed hyung, Daehyunnie gives you his regards." Kyungsoo's smile is smug as he holds out his hand and Yongguk rolls his eyes before handing it to the younger, they return to the living room area where Kai is letting in Hwasa and Wheein.

"Why the long face Yongguk oppa?" Wheein has a grin on her lips and she's clearly seen the weed that Kyungsoo had already confiscated, he rolls his eyes and sits down on the couch while Kai shoves him over to make room.

"Are all of you in on this? Daehyun's so extra for god's sake." Yongguk grumbles and even though he wants to be thankful, he's really tired and he just wants a little buzz to get him going.

"It's for your own good oppa. Daehyun oppa just cares for you." Hwasa plops herself down beside Kai and the two sandwich the eldest into the edge of the sofa to his demise. Wheein on the other hand goes to where Kyungsoo is.

"Lemme see your bar for a second oppa." Wheein says as she bumps her hips into Kyungsoo's causing the man to almost drop his spatula into the spaghetti and he gives her a glare before gesturing to the cupboard above her.

"How the heck do you even reach up here, you get Jongin oppa to get everything huh." Wheein scoffs as she presses her palm on the counter and reaches upward with her other hand in hopes to reach the alcohol.

"Yah don't disrespect me in my own kitchen brat, I can reach it just fine." Kyungsoo frowns at her and she huffs before placing her hands on her hips, the others in the living room simply watch and Hwasa is laughing.

"Well then, show me. Hand down the rum and blue curaçao please." Wheein points to the cupboard which really wasn't that tall then again the two were pretty short, especially Wheein.

"Fine, move aside shortie." Kyungsoo shoos her to the side and Wheein plays with her braids as she leans on the counter with a knowing smirk and her dimple embedded into her cheek.

They all watch in silence as Kyungsoo assumes the same position as Wheein did, he reaches upward and Yongguk hears the cupboard opening at least. Kyungsoo grunts as he reaches upward and the sound of clinking glass could be heard, his stomach is slightly exposed as his shirt rises up and he sighs.

"Jongin-ah." he says simply but with a pout and he returns to his cooking at the stove quietly, Wheein of course goes over to tease him and Kai stands from the couch before heading behind the counter.

"Which ones again Wheein-ah?" Kai asks to save his boyfriend from humiliation and she bounces to his side, pointing to the two bottles she needed. Hwasa stood from the couch and placed a plastic bag on the counter by her best friend.

"I should probably do something huh." Yongguk slowly begins to lounge on the couch and he takes up almost all the room, the others laugh at him and he just takes in a deep breath of comfort.

"Well hyung you'll have to get up soon anyways, dinner is ready." Kyungsoo's tone is mocking as he carries a tray towards the dining room table, Kai helps him set out plates and cutlery while Hwasa and Wheein work on the drinks together.

"Thanks Kyungsoo. On a side note, Wheein, you're the back up bartender right?" Yongguk sits down at the table and he helps Kai set up the things in the correct places. He'd sit at the head while the couple and best friends sat in front of each other.

"I am, I have my license and quite a bit of experience but Daehyun oppa is never in need of my help. Also, Jongin and Sehun oppa's would be useless on stage without me." she says playfully as she gets some glasses from the cupboards.

"Hey, we managed just fine when you sprained your ankle last month." Kai said in dismay and Kyungsoo grinned before pressing a kiss on his temple. Wheein remains at the counter whilst fiddling with her things and Hwasa goes to her purse that she left on the couch.

"Hmm? Yongguk oppa, someone is texting you." she picks up the phone and holds it out for Yongguk even though the man is quite far from where she was. He purses his lips and licks his lips,

"If it's Daehyun or Himchan you can just leave it." he waves at her nonchalantly and Kyungsoo tells Wheein she can do the drinks after dinner since what she was making wouldn't suit what he cooked anyways, she reluctantly agrees and takes a seat beside him.

"It's someone named Junhong." as soon as Hwasa says the name out loud they all still in realization. Yongguk's eyes widen and his mind runs in circles, no doubt the others knew about the certain client that always gave him some kind of trouble.

"Hyung, you know we're not allowed to contact clients outside of work." Kyungsoo frowns and Hwasa nods her head in agreement. As the sexual workers in the club, they weren't allowed to engage with clients, Wheein and Kai were public performers so they didn't have the same rules.

"It's not like that, just don't worry about it." Yongguk tries to dismiss the problem but he knows that Kyungsoo and Hwasa weren't going to let it go, they knew the consequences and how dangerous it could be.

"He's just a kid. There's no threat, he simply needed someone to talk to." he reasons and Hwasa takes a seat beside Kai who was looking down at his hands underneath the table cloth.

"Yongguk oppa, you know more than anyone that we are not normal people. We always take our careers with us no matter where we go. Mr. Bang is not who Bang Yongguk is, are you willing to let him learn both parts of you?" Hwasa grips his phone tightly and she hands it to him.

"We all care about you. And things are beginning to stir now that this Junhong person showed up, we're BDSM workers, prostitutes, strippers, adult entertainers, whatever you want to call it. We can't escape from that." Kyungsoo explains and Yongguk wants to argue.

He wants to say that they're so much more than their occupations, that they all have their own personalities and dreams but he knows better than that. They may be more, but their careers only left them with so many choices, so many opinions against them.

Yongguk dejectedly tosses his phone on the couch and he smiles at them wryly, telling them that they should eat.

 

"You're smoking more than usual Junhong." Youngjae grabs the pack from the youngest before he manages to snag his third cigarette of the day, they were currently outside of school property after skipping their last period class. Neither of them had gone home yet and the skies were darkened already.

"He's been looking at his phone all day." Jongup tells him and Junhong leers at the betrayal before he takes one last drag of the cigarette in between his lips, he drops it to the ground and smashes it with his shoe.

"You said you wanted to tell us something right?" Junhong turns the spotlight on his step brother and Jongup nods before he sits comfortably on the bench they were currently occupying.

"Himchan hyung is throwing an early holiday party in two weeks. He said that most of his friends are too busy during Christmas so he's hosting it earlier. You guys interested in coming?" Youngjae raises an eyebrow at the proposition, they weren't really party people despite common belief.

"I don't see any problem with it, you want us to come?" Youngjae smirks and Jongup rolls his eyes before shoving the other roughly on the arm. Junhong looks down at his phone and sees that there's no new messages.

"It'd be more fun if you guys came, otherwise it'd just be a bunch of people my brother's and Himchan hyung's age." Jongup shrugs and tosses his finished cigarette on the ground, leaving it to smoke.

"You're just going to end up fucking Himchan hyung in one of the rooms anyways, we're going to get left behind again." Youngjae rolls his eyes and Jongup doesn't argue since they have a point.

"Look, you guys might find some people at the party too. I saw how you were eyeing Daehyun hyung at the mall Youngjae." this time Jongup gets roughly shoved on the arm and Junhong laughs a loud.

"Fine we'll go."

 

Medicine - The 1975


	10. Love Don't Hurt

During the night Junhong is often met with thoughts that he doesn't wish to face. His head spins and twirls in the constant worries and questions that plague him to no end. His fingers clench and loosen around his duvet as empty eyes stare at the dark hallways outside his open door.

Nausea pools in his stomach and he takes a deep breath, his lids fluttering closed at the velvet voice in his memories, gently reminding him to breathe slowly. But soon enough his teeth grit together and he sits up in frustration.

Aside from the mischievous acts in his childhood he hadn't exactly been a terrible child, so why was he all alone? The truth surrounding his parents death was one of a mystery, his adoptive parents didn't know what to tell him either.

He'd been told that he grew up in the orphanage with his older brother, until he was 6 years old when the Moon's adopted him. According to them, his brother had refused to be adopted as well, he chose to live alone but he still wanted to provide what he could for his younger brother.

Although Junhong couldn't understand why he didn't live with them then move out once he was able he wondered if it'd been his fault. Was he a shame for his older brother? Or possibly, the truth about their family was so heavy that it'd be best to live seperately?

Junhong shook his head from all the possibilities and he reached for his phone, bleary eyes squinted at the bright lock screen screaming that it was currently 1 in the morning. He stood up and gently pushed the door, enough so that it was almost closed, he knew that his family members would be suspicious if it was fully closed.

He goes to his messages with Mr. Bang and the lack of replies makes his heart feel heavy, nonetheless Junhong presses the call icon and waits patiently with his phone shaking by his ear.

" _Hello, Junhong_?" Mr. Bang's groggy voice brings such comfort to him, he feels afraid. Junhong crosses his legs and he hugs a pillow in his lap. He shifts for a second before speaking.

"I'm sorry Bang, did I wake you?" he was slightly confused considering the club usually closed around 2am, so what was Mr. Bang doing at home so early? He didn't want to pry however so he doesn't consider asking.

" _It's alright... did you need something?_ " his tone is curt. Cold. Junhong bites his lower lip and suddenly he feels nothing but anxiety and fear. He curls up into himself and wants to say something but his mouth opens and closes like a fish.

"Why is it I can only reach you at night?" Junhong asks and he feels something odd in his stomach, was it a feeling of betrayal? He'd been told that it'd be okay if he called sometimes and now the man was acting like he was a complete bother.

" _I'm not sure how you want me to answer that. I have things to do during the day, people to see._ " Mr. Bang says and Junhong grips the pillow with his free hand, biting his lower lip.

"Is this a dream?" Junhong whispers, the other day had been much sweeter. He'd completely put aside the man's occupation and was willing to become a friend through all that but there was a front.

" _I'm a nightmare. You should stay away from me. You're just a client. Delete my number Junhong_." he freezes when the call ends and he looks at the screen of his phone with a confused heart.

 

Yongguk runs his hands through his hair as he approaches Himchan's house. He felt frustrated and annoyed considering he was practically living in a drama and he hated it to bits.

But he knew that this would be better in the long run. He'd let his emotions run wild the first night Junhong had called, listening to his little brother's struggles and concerns made him feel protective but he wasn't in any position to help him.

Not when he was harbouring the secret that could potentially ruin their bond forever, a secret that could destroy Junhong's already fragile mind. He wanted his brother to grow up at normally as possible, without the weight of his brother's occupation on his mind.

He can hear the music from the front lawn and he sighs into his scarf. Himchan wasn't exactly wealthy but he was well off to the point he had a house as supposed to an apartment or condo, so parties were quite frequent throughout the year.

And somehow he managed to have numerous people over each time. Yongguk truly underestimated the amount of friends Himchan actually had. He ventured inside and passed by the few groups casually drinking on the front porch.

As soon as he enters he sees a couple making out on the staircase and people sitting on the floors, making it difficult to navigate through them. The sound of music grows louder as the living room comes into sight and he sees Daehyun behind a DIY bar set up.

"Yongguk hyung!" the younger greets him with a wide grin as he pours off two shots for a waiting young man who Yongguk has never seen before. He sits on one of the stools in front of the bar and nearly falls over because of how unstable it is.

"Where's Himchan?" Yongguk asks over the booming bass and Daehyun glances around, skimming the dancing heads and sweaty bodies with a scrunched nose. But ultimately he simply shrugs and he takes a swig of his cocktail.

"Not too sure. He bribed me into bar duty." Daehyun tattles and Yongguk can only offer his friend a sympathetic smile. Soon enough another man who Yongguk finds vaguely familiar comes up behind the bar and wraps his arms around Daehyun.

"Mm tired." the person mumbles and Yongguk is surprised he even managed to hear it. Daehyun grins a smile brighter than the sun and he turns to kiss the person on the nose.

"Hyung I told you that Youngjae and I were dating right?" Daehyun leans on the counter and Youngjae seems to have fallen asleep on him if that was even possible. Yongguk raises an eyebrow and clears his throat,

"You've mentioned him a few times I guess." he murmurs and Daehyun lets out an unattractive sound showing that he didn't hear what was said. Yongguk rolls his eyes with a smirk and stands up before he heads towards the backyard in hopes of finding Himchan.

Worming through more and more people he finally makes his way through the kitchen and towards the sliding doors and lead to the deck out back. It's much quieter out here and Yongguk soon sees that about 90% of the people are indoors.

He smells the familiar scent of weed and when he turns to his left he meets a tuff of fluffy blonde hair, freshly washed. Yongguk stands completely still when unfocused eyes greet his own and his jaw tightens.

Junhong sits lazily on the floor of the deck rather than on a chair and he exhales the last of his joint, crumbles of two others laying by his hand as well as three empty bottles of beer. Yongguk is so shocked he doesn't even register that he has no mask on.

"I met you in the mall once." the teen says with a slur and a giggle and Yongguk's eyes widen. He couldn't run, that'd be cowardly and just down right strange. Junhong pushes himself up and he drops the joint to the floor.

Junhong approaches him with uneven footsteps and he falls into his older brother's arms with a chortle. Yongguk supports him easily and Junhong leans down to press a kiss against his neck before he whispers in his ear.

"Dance with me Mr. Bang."

 

Love Don't Hurt - Shannon Ft. Amber


	11. Chronic

Yongguk doesn't argue as the teen stares deep into his eyes with an undeniable want. Junhong stumbles and burps before excusing himself and he holds Yongguk's hands tightly in his own. 

The elder lets himself be led back into the house, past the people strewn about. Junhong's hand feels warm in his own and when they reach the dance floor the teen spins around and wraps his arms around his neck.

"Dance with me. Dance with me." he whispers desperately and Yongguk almost misses what he says with how loud the music is. The bodies around them are frantic to move with the beat while their pretty much standing still.

Yongguk meets his little brother's glassy eyes and he grits his teeth before he holds his lithe waist. Junhong grins happily at his request being honoured and he instantly rolls his body, bumping their lower halves together with clumsy coordination.

He can see Daehyun's worried gaze from behind the bar and he closes his eyes, he knows that the bartender never drinks when working and he was fully taking in the scene. His eyes slowly open once more and he thankfully sees that Youngjae is too wasted to see what's happening.

Youngjae was Junhong's friend, he'd become aware of that fact now and the less people that knew about their odd relationship the better. The teen in his arms begins to grow more impatient and he doesn't seem happy with the fact that his dance partner was distracted.

"Kiss me." Junhong presses his lips against Yongguk's in a hurry and the elder gasps when a sharp pain registers in his brain and the taste of copper explodes in his mouth. He pulls away and licks over his raw bottom lip, having suffered from abuse.

"Please, help me forget him." the teen's voice cracks and he sounds like he's on the verge of tears. Yongguk's eyes widen and he comes to realize that Junhong doesn't know who he is after all, he simply wishes that he was here.

Yongguk lets himself be pulled away once more, Junhong's grasp tight around his wrist as they stumble up the stairwell towards the bedrooms. The teen opens the nearest one on his right and to their horror the room was occupied.

"Yongguk? Junhong?" Himchan is on all fours facing the door as Jongup pounds into him from behind. Yongguk instantly shuts the door and he prays to the Lord that Junhong didn't hear his name. The teen was aware of what his brother's name was. All too well.

"Come." Yongguk leads him to a room near the end of the hall, one that he recognizes as the guest bedroom that Himchan often lent him when he needed to stay over late. Junhong is silent and it's unsettling.

The door closes behind them and Junhong flings himself into Yongguk's arms, he humps against him in hopes of gaining friction and they both groan as their heated members brush.

Yongguk clenches his eyes tight and he gives into his desires. He kisses Junhong harshly and they fall back onto the bed, with the teen on top of him. Junhong holds his face and waits till the elder opens his eyes before he looks deeply into them.

"You're a stranger but you feel like someone I know." he whispers as his fingers trace the man's features. Yongguk lets his hands rest on the teen's waist and he lets out an airy breath when Junhong sucks a dark mark onto his neck.

"Show me more."

 

Chronic - Phoebe Ryan


	12. Body Talk

The way Junhong looks at him makes him feel stripped bare, as though nothing was protecting him from such an honest gaze. It made his head spin and his heart shake, for of all things, he was most certainly not honest. Yongguk's whole life was a lie, one after another to the point that he couldn't live truthfully anymore.

He'd lose himself completely.

"You're thinking too much," Junhong's voice drags him from his loud thoughts and when he looks at his younger brother he feels that maybe, thinking was a better idea. Thinking meant he could be rational, Junhong was drunk and emotional, he was taking advantage of him wasn't he?

"And you're not thinking enough," Yongguk chides and the look on Junhong's face makes him feel like he just kicked a puppy. Suddenly, the teen grabs him by the collar of his shirt and shoves him down onto the bed, before Yongguk can react Junhong sits down in his lap and straddles him with his long limbs.

"I think too much, way too much. And you know what it's done for me? Do you know what it does to me?" Junhong grits through his teeth and Yongguk can smell the liquor on his tongue, he doesn't reply and he simply waits. Though he's well aware this won't do anything good for him.

"It hurts me, it hurts so much," Junhong's voice cracks and he clutches his chest as though he's just been shot. Yongguk feels his heart clench and he winces at the pain, why did things have to be so difficult? If Junhong had never found him maybe things would still be okay, or maybe... if Yongguk hadn't left him in the first place.

"All I can think of is him, even when I have you beneath me," Yongguk's hands naturally come to hold his little brother's face and he let's their eyes meet before he smiles and tries to pry him off, so that they're no longer in a seemingly sexual position.

"Junhong, you're drunk, you don't want this," he attempts to comfort the hurt teenager and he doesn't realize his mistake. Junhong doesn't move an inch, instead he moves closer and he presses himself even closer to Yongguk, their body heat mingling.

"How do you know my name?" Junhong whispers into his ear and his lips brush the pierced lobe. Yongguk's eyes widen and he feels panic coursing through his body. He can only rely on how drunk Junhong possibly was, he'd forget about this in the morning.

"You know me, I know you," his voice is melodic as he sways left and right, a bitter smile on his lips as he sings the words like he's trying to solve something inside of his head. Yongguk can only watch helplessly as his years of secrecy begin to crumble in front of him. 

"But how do I know you?" Junhong breathes his words and connects their lips. Yongguk's hands naturally fall to Junhong's waist and he grips the fabric of his brother's shirt, his hands in a constant debate of whether he should push him away or pull him closer.

The way Junhong moves against him makes it clear that he's intoxicated, Yongguk doesn't even know what he was smoking. However, the sweet heat of Junhong's mouth dripped temptation and he wasn't strong enough to resist, not when the teen was so pliant and submissive above him.

Yongguk rolls to his left, successfully pinning Junhong underneath him. The way Junhong tilts his head upwards made it clear, he was lusting for Yongguk in his drunken state. But the hint of insecurity in his dilated eyes said something else as well, something that Yongguk himself didn't want to admit.

There was more than lust, and in Yongguk's case there was more than just brotherly love.

"Please, please touch me," Junhong is desperate, his hips jutting upwards in hopes of any kind of friction. Yongguk takes a deep breath and he let's go of his persona for just once. For just once, it'd be him, Bang Yongguk and not Mr. Bang. Simply Bang Yongguk and Choi Junhong.

Their lips come together once more in a rough manner, lips crushing against one another as they muffle Junhong's helpless whimpers. Yongguk uses one arm to hold himself up while the other trails down to tug at Junhong's belt loops in his jeans.

Clearly it doesn't move the tight material and he can't help but grope Junhong's ass, groaning when he realizes the teen's jeans are so tight they leave little to imagination. Yongguk pulls away and he leans back before he admires what he's done to Junhong, those swollen lips and teary eyes were because of him.

Junhong undoes his jean buttons and he pulls down the zipper before he lifts his ass, teasingly waiting for Yongguk to pull them down. Naturally the clothing pulls down Junhong's undergarments as well leaving his naked bottom half on the white sheets. His cock lays half hard on his abdomen, pearly white dripping from his reddened tip.

As Yongguk's dark gaze trails over his legs Junhong playfully spreads them and he pulls up his shirt so that the other man can get a better look. Yongguk says nothing as he lets his hands rest on Junhong's inner thighs, his slender fingers rest on the soft skin and Junhong squirms at the cold skin against his own.

He lifts Junhong's legs before he kisses his ballsack and when a small gasp edges him on he lets his tongue drag up the underside of Junhong's cock. Yongguk feeds off of the teen's reactions as he suckles the tip into his mouth and tastes the leaking slit.

Their eyes meet and Junhong reaches down to grip Yongguk's long locks of hair, his fingers rubbing through the gel keeping them slicked back. His head falls back into the pillows as his whole length disappears into wet heat and his hips try to move but Yongguk holds them down.

"Stroke yourself Junhong," Yongguk commands him softly and he presses the pad of his thumb right under Junhong's balls, above his entrance. The action makes the teen keen and he hastefully does as he's told. His hand shakes as he wraps it around his member and Junhong bites his lower lip when he feels a hot breath hovering over his hole.

"Good boy," Junhong moans loudly as Yongguk licks a stripe up the wrinkled skin and he sucks on it like it's a treat. His hands still keep the teen's legs apart since they threaten to close as they shake from pleasure. 

"I'm so close," the small whimper makes his clothed cock twitch and Yongguk keeps his desires aside, he merely wants to ring out Junhong's sexual drive so that he doesn't do anything they'll both regret the morning after. 

"Then come Junhong, come for me," Yongguk doesn't expect Junhong to take hold of his face, and just as his cock begins spewing white onto his abdomen he licks his way into Yongguk's mouth, whimpering deliciously as he reaches his long awaited release.

They both close their eyes and move sensually against one another, lips touching lightly as tongues caress. Their breaths mingle as Junhong tries to catch his breath from his orgasm. Yongguk only opens his eyes when he feels a hand at his belt,

"You too," Junhong whispers with lidded eyes, but he's fighting to keep them open and Yongguk knows more than anyone how difficult it can be to make him cum so he smiles and takes hold of Junhong's wandering hand, 

"Rest Junhong," Yongguk orders and the teen attempts to fight against the strong grip but he has no strength, not when the alcohol and drugs in his system are beginning to shut him down. Junhong lies on the bed with his eyes closed and Yongguk works around him.

In his tired mind he can remember those touches, there was only one other person who had touched him like that and he knew exactly who this person was. But as his skin is wiped down and his bottom half is dressed again, he can't come to a conclusion.

"I'll tell Jongup where to find you," Yongguk mumbles and he freezes when he lets yet another thing slip. Spending so much time with his little brother was really beginning to effect his mind and he wasn't sure whether it was positive or negative. Judging by how he wants to get high right now it was definitely negative. Not to mention how he was currently hard without any form of relief other than himself.

"Stay with me?" Junhong's broken voice breaks the silence and Yongguk looks down to see his brother weakly holding the hem of his shirt. He can't find it in himself to leave when Junhong is so vulnerable so he can only nod as he lies down beside the teen.

Yongguk lies on top of the duvet as supposed to beneath it, he leaves a barrier between them but he rests close enough for Junhong to feel the comfort of his body heat. When the teen's breath lulls Yongguk leans forward and kisses his forehead.

 

_"Welcome to your new home boys," Moon Junki says to the two boys sitting in the back seat, he'd just brought them home from the orphanage after weeks of paperwork and interviews that allowed him to adopt both of them. His wife was at work while their youngest son was home for Spring break.  
_

_"At the moment your mother is at work, she'll be home in the evening, you two can meet Jongup. He's been looking forward to meeting you," Junki explains and he can see that the joy has been drained from their faces. Choi Junhong, the younger one looks like he hasn't smiled in years while his older brother Bang Yongguk looks ready to hurt anyone who comes near them unnannounced._

_"Thank you," Yongguk says under his breath and Junki smiles at that, he parks the car and gets out first before grabbing their bags from the trunk. Just as he's about to lift a small bright blue backpack Yongguk stops him,_

_"I'll carry this, thank you," Junki blinks in surprise and the teen holds out the bag for his brother to take. The six year old holds the bag dear to his heart and he holds his brother's hand tightly. The two don't have much clothing and Yongguk had been homeschooled at the orphanage so he had no school supplies._

_Junki locks his car and makes his way to the front door, the brothers trailing behind him. As he's about to put his key in the lock the door swings open revealing a smiling Jongup._

_"Welcome home!" Jongup grins up at them and Junki's heart warms at the sight. They all enter in a rush and the door is locked before Jongup takes hold of Junhong's hand, Junki doesn't miss how the action makes the orphan boy flinch._

_"Want to see your new room? Want to play?" Jongup is giddy and he jumps up and down. Junhong looks up at Yongguk, unsure, and he only releases his brother's hand when he receives permission in the form of a nod. And soon enough the six and seven year old are speeding up the stairs._

_"It takes time but Junhong is a bright child," Yongguk's voice is low as he looks back at his adoptive father and unlike his younger brother he takes the time to scan the new household. He carefully treads into the living room and he sees family portraits on the fireplace._

_"I guess I should tell you, our eldest son, Jonghyun, passed away two years ago due to an accident during a school trip," Yongguk looks at him with sympathetic eyes and Junki doesn't know how to feel, the first change of facial expression in this teenager and it was to pity him._

_"I'm sorry to hear that," Yongguk keeps his head low and he says nothing more. Junki feels the silence building up in his throat and he coughs before the teen meets his eyes once more,_

_"We've come to terms with the past, however my wife is still uncomfortable with the subject, come I'll show you to your room," Junki pats his back and Yongguk too, flinches at the contact. He heads up the stairs with the brothers' things in hand and he turns left towards a hall with two bedrooms, coming from within one is the childish banter between Jongup and Junhong._

_"Junhong will share a room with Jongup, while you can have this room to yourself, I know how teenagers prefer their own space," Yongguk enters the spacious room and he looks around with a sigh before he turns back towards Junki._

_"Thank you, however I have no intentions of living here," Yongguk admits and Junki's eyes widen. The teen shows no signs of hesitance, and his eyes seem determined, fired with something Junki can't understand._

_"I appreciate that you've taken in my brother and I, truly. However, I will depart tomorrow, and please raise my brother as your own," Yongguk bows his head and his posture is proper as he speaks of his wishes. Junki frowns and he doesn't know what this kid is saying,_

_"How will you possibly survive on your own?! Look, Yongguk-ah I know you've been through a lot-"_

_"Please don't try and understand me," Yongguk cuts him off, cold. The air in the room grows heavy with tension and Junhong's small giggles can be heard across the hall, Yongguk softens at this but when he meets Junki's eyes his expression is hard once more._

_"My parent's inheritance... was passed down to me because I have the surname of our father. I will be disowned from the Moon Family the moment I turn 18, however I will continue to provide support for Junhong," the plans sound simple but Junki can tell that Yongguk has meticulously thought of everything prior to the adoption, possibly during the process._

_"What will you tell Junhong? Will you leave him like your parents did?" It was clear to even the blind that the brother's were close. The younger brother relied heavily on the elder and he was so fragile, Junki regrets the way he used his words, this was still a teenage boy in front of him._

_"They aren't dead," the words come out in a rush under a huff of breath, so quick that Junki couldn't even process them before Yongguk was passing by him to knock on Jongup's door._

_As night fell upon them, the tension between Yongguk and his adoptive parents didn't lift in the slightest. Moon Jieun, his adoptive mother, had been completely appalled when her husband told her of the news. However she did not have a chance to argue because Junki had told her that Yongguk was stubborn and he would not relent._

_"Thank you for the meal," Yongguk bows and Junhong follows before the two brothers make their way towards Yongguk's bedroom. It was clear that Junhong was not going to spend the night apart from him, so they brushed their teeth and snuggled close in the bed._

_"I like them," Junhong's hushed whisper cuts through the night air and Yongguk feels relief, they're good people and they'll take care of him. Yongguk moves closer as Junhong's hands grip the hem of his shirt,_

_"Stay with me?" He asks with teary eyes and Yongguk nods before leaning down to kiss his forehead. Junhong grows afraid whenever they're apart, the brothers fell asleep together at the orphanage but the nuns had scolded them and often sent Yongguk back to the room with the other teenagers, which resulted in Junhong waking in tears surrounded by the other kids._

_When Junhong falls asleep and his grip loosens that's when Yongguk decides to leave him. It pains his heart more than he'd like to admit, leaving his little brother all alone after the loss they'd just experienced. He didn't want to go, he wanted to stay and live like a normal teenager, but unfortunately that couldn't happen._

_Yongguk pulls himself away from the bed and when Junhong instantly stirs upon the lack of warmth he grabs the child's bright blue bag, he pulls out the plush bunny that their mother sewed for him and placed it into Junhong's embrace._

_The teen grabs his bag and his jacket before he kisses his brother on the forehead one last time, he exits the room quietly and pads downstairs where his adoptive parents are seated at the living room table, talking to one another in hushed voices._

_"Are you sure there isn't anything we can do to make you stay?" Jieun's eyes remind him of the past and Yongguk has to look away in shame, he shakes his head and slips on his shoes._

_"Thank you for everything, also, Junhong still has nightmares so please take care of him, he cries a lot," Yongguk smiles for the first time since he arrived and he bows his head low before he slips out the door and into the night._

 

In the middle of the night Yongguk opens his eyes and he frantically checks his phone, he squints at the low light and sees that it's currently 4:43AM. Only then does he remember that there's a clock on the night table, the red numbers bleed in the dark, reminding him that it's time to leave.

The memories of his past haunt him and he'll never forgive himself for the night he left Junhong behind. The night he became a dead man to the only person he cared about. However, regret wouldn't change what was already done.

Yongguk sighs and he gets his things together before he looks down at Junhong, who sleeps like a cherub child. He lets his hand lay on the teen's head before he stands and he marches towards the door.

He glances back at Junhong once more and the moment the clock hits 4:44AM he flees.

 

Body Talk - Red Velvet


	13. All Night

_Yongguk kicks a stone across the streets as he shivers and buries his face further into the collar of his jacket. He'd figured during the Spring that the nights wouldn't be cold but he underestimated the streets of Seoul. It'd been exactly two days since he left the Moon residence, he'd made sure to flee far from the quaint neighbourhood to avoid any possible contact with them._

_He'd return when he was able to begin providing for Junhong. His inheritance wouldn't be readily available for him until after he turned 18 and that wasn't till another two years. For the past two nights he'd been surviving off of the money that the Moon's had given him, unable to refuse their hospitality. Earlier today he'd attempted to visit his uncle for help but the man had screamed at him stating that he had no sister._

_And so here he was, standing underneath a streetlight because even if he was illuminated for the world to see, he felt oddly safe encased in the cool light. His eyes were heavy and he wanted nothing more than to sleep, but there was no way he could head towards a shelter at this time, and he most certainly could not afford a hotel or motel or any sorts. Yongguk sighed, weighing his options once more before deciding that maybe finding a place outside would suffice._

_He'd made the mistake of not paying attention to alleyways before and he nearly winded up in a fight with a local homeless woman who'd claimed that area to be her own, he truly didn't want to cause any trouble so he was quiet, playing off as a mute before he went on his way vowing silently to never cross her path again. As Yongguk was lost in his thoughts a car slowly pulled up in front of him and when the windows rolled down he was met with a woman wearing sunglasses despite it being evening._

_"How much are you charging for?" Her words were blunt and foreign to him. Shocked, Yongguk turned his head left and right seeing women and men all lined up beneath the streetlights with sparse clothing and their bodies flaunted. Had he wandered so close to the red district without knowing? How did he not notice before? Yongguk cursed at his own ignorance and he looked at the woman eyes although he was only staring at his own reflection._

_He definitely wasn't clueless and he knew the pleasures of so called, sexual intercourse but he'd been taught to do so with someone who he loved. Someone who loved him. This woman definitely did not love him. But this woman offered a place to stay for the night, safety for even a few moments, who knew what the other workers eyeing him would do once she left. Yongguk grits his teeth and maybe he can pull this off._

_"100,000 won a night..." he says quietly and he feels like the woman can see right through him. She smiles and unlocks the door, waiting for him to get in. Yongguk holds his bag close to his chest and all he can smell is a woman's perfume and the heady scent of the blue tree freshener looped around the air conditioning vent. The smile doesn't leave her lips and she turns to him once they stop at a red light,_

_"I'm Yongsun, what would you like me to call you?" What an uncommon name for a young woman he thought. Truthfully, Yongsun looked like she was only a few years older than him, blossoming in her early 20's. He couldn't see her features fully but he could tell she had two distinct dimples at each corner beside her bottom lip. She seemed youthful almost, her hair long and wavy._

_"Bbang," he answers simply, thinking that the nickname from his classmate Himchan would suffice. Yongsun pauses at this, a small smile spreading on her lips as she turns into what appears to be a pretty shabby neighbourhood. They park in front of a sad looking townhouse and Yongguk follows Yongsun quietly, cautious of her movements as he enters the home behind her._

_After removing his shoes he notices that she's vanished, confused Yongguk heads down the hall and he can see Yongsun placing a kettle on the stove, presumably filled with hot water. She places her sunglasses on the kitchen table and she looks at him for the first time without tinted vision. Her painted nails click on the table tops and she nods towards the chair,_

_"Have a seat, I'll make you some tea," she says in a gentle tone and Yongguk doesn't know what to do other than obey. For a moment there's nothing but silence, aside from the bubbling of water and the sound of a clock ticking somewhere in the living room. Yongguk remains completely still, his hands white as they grip onto his bag, did they usually have tea before getting down and dirty? His eyes shut and he took a deep breath, trying to compose himself._

_"Let me get straight to the point alright, I'd like to offer you a possible solution," Yongsun begins and only when he hears a cup being placed in front of him does he open his eyes. Yongsun is sitting across from him, a motherly smile on her face, he flinches and looks away. Yongguk carefully reaches out for the cup and he merely keeps his hands hovering around it, soaking in the warmth without getting burnt._

_"It's not the first time I've seen you wandering the streets Bbang, I can tell you're still in high school but considering it's Spring Break, why are you not spending it at home? You don't have to answer, I've already assumed and judging by your face, I'm correct," Yongsun sips her tea and beckons for Yongguk to do the same, he's cautious but her gaze is so honest he does so anyways. The fresh taste of ginger and green tea delights his tongue and he feels like he's been heated from the inside out._

_"You see Bbang, basically would you like to live with me? I can provide you with a job after you're finished high school," Yongsun says frankly and Yongguk's eyes widen. Either she was planning to sell him or murder him, he really had no other options in mind. Why was the look in her eyes so honest? So caring? It really threw off his observations._

_"You see, I work at a club that provides BDSM services. It's not exactly selling your body but... you'll be selling services. There's no penetration required so the risks are a little less? I know it's not ideal, but I'd really like to help you," Yongsun blurts out and Yongguk freezes. An image of masks and whips immediately slither into his head and he wants to laugh out loud. But also, he's considering it. Anything's an option for Junhong's sake._

_"It's almost like acting? The tips are amazing, and of course I won't let you start when you're still underaged, but you can learn and observe. This is the only path I can provide for you until you find your own," Yongsun whispers and her grip around her mug begins to waver. Yongguk doesn't know what to say, he looks around the townhouse and it's almost too good to be true._

_"Why would you do this for me?" Yongguk asks the question he's been waiting for and Yongsun all but pauses. She looks deep into his eyes and there it is again, that look that could make Yongguk bow to her every will. Her fingernails tap against the glass mug and she pulls out her phone. After unlocking it and scrolling for a moment, she pulls up a photo of two very familiar people stood beside a younger Yongsun._

_"For them, and for you," Yongsun smiles and Yongguk's hands fall to the table lifelessly, his eyes glued onto the screen. Yongsun reaches forward and she gently takes his hands into her own, unlike what he imagined her hands were quite cold._

_"So what do you say, Bang Yongguk?"_

 

Yongguk runs out of Himchan's house with sweat lining his forehead and only one destination in mind. _Home_. He breaks into a jog and almost loses his footing as he rushes across freshly watered grass, morning dew dampening his pants. The sun is beginning to rise he realizes when he approaches the same shabby neighbourhood he'd lived in years ago. 

He needs to talk to somebody, somebody who would listen to him but not ask any questions. Daehyun and Himchan cared for him, he knew that more than anybody but there was only one person who came into mind at this very moment. And when Yongguk uses his spare key to open the door to a small townhouse he's not surprised to smell ginger tea in the air.

The strong aroma brings him comfort and just like before he follows it towards the kitchen where Yongsun is already waiting for him with a cup at hand. She smiles upon seeing him and just as he steps through the doorway the sunlight seeps into the room, littering the floor with rays of bright sunlight. Yongguk takes a seat and he rubs his hands down his face.

"Himchan told me you'd be on your way. How long has it been? Since we sat together like this and had tea together?" Yongsun asks as she stirs her tea with a spoon, the clinking sound bringing him comfort. It'd been quite awhile, if he had to be honest. Since Yongsun lived with Byulyi now, he felt he had no right to interrupt not to mention how he'd been relying on drugs to ease the stress off of his head.

Yongguk should've known Himchan would call her, he did interrupt his love session with Jongup to relay Junhong's condition before stating that he'd be leaving. It was scary how much his friends knew him. Daehyun definitely would've done the same thing. He sighs and takes a sip of his tea. After all these years Yongsun never bothered to buy from a different brand. 

"I feel lost... I've done things to somebody that can't be forgiven but that person doesn't even know and he wants to find me," Yongguk feels like he can play off a lie for a little longer. No one had to know that he'd slept with his brother and lusted after his brother... made his brother cry. Yongsun already knew who he was talking about, but speaking vaguely was the only way he could avoid looking at the problem for a little longer.

"At this point I'm thinking it's better to just run... it's so much easier to continue running from my problems. He's persistent but I'm stubborn," Yongsun listens quietly, almost too quietly as though Yongguk was speaking to himself. But she knew this would help, she preferred to create a self aware environment whenever it came to Yongguk since he lived his life for another, he rarely ever truly thought about himself.

"I didn't think he'd ever find me... and he didn't even know it. We've met, we've talked and he doesn't have a single clue. How am I supposed to live knowing that I'm still deceiving him? Just like I did when we were children?" Yongguk shakes his head and he rests his forehead on the table after carefully moving his mug. He takes a deep breath and continues inhaling and exhaling slowly.

"Yongguk-ah, you know what the problem is? I can't help you," Yongsun says quietly in that childish yet motherly tone she's had since they met. Yongguk doesn't move when she places a hand on his head. She doesn't stroke his head nor does she play with his hair, she merely keeps it there. As if she was trying to give him some kind of support but not knowing how.

"I can't help you if you don't tell me everything... just like before."

 

All Night - Long D Ft. Kim Doyeon (Weki Meki)

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello hello, yes I am alive LOL
> 
> It's been awhile ;; I'm sorry as always, to be honest I'm still figuring out where I want this to go
> 
> Hence why the flashbacks ugh, I don't want to end it too quickly? But I also don't want it to be repetitive... I'll think of something ;D
> 
> As usual, I've been occupied with my fest fics ;; I'm currently in two and I have thoughts on joining another that begins in March LOL but we'll see, I'd like to stay fest free for a bit after that
> 
> Thank you so much as always for the love and support :D <3
> 
> \- Airi
> 
> P.S. Yongsun makes little to no sense LOL but Yongguk clearly didn't get like kidnapped and forced to work there so we're just gonna bypass reality for a bit since this is fiction anyhow 


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